Seinfeld's Netflix Pop-Tart Movie Unfrosted Is an Embarrassment

When I was a kid, I liked Pop-Tarts. I don't think it's a particularly novel feeling for an American child; They are delicious squares of dough and fruit packaged in silver packets, like bricks of cocaine for children. Like many kids (and some adults), I never thought about the fact that something I liked might be bad for me, until one day in eighth grade, Mrs. Schenck saw one of us open a package and said, ” There's “There's Zero Nutritional Value in a Pop-Tart” Maybe you thought shaming would change the habits of a bunch of lanky preteens, however, Pop-Tarts aren't the province of anyone remotely concerned with shaming.

without freezing, Jerry Seinfeld's Netflix-produced directorial debut, is loosely based on the crazy story of how Pop-Tarts came to be. Seinfeld, who also co-wrote the film, plays Bob Cabana, a Kellogg's marketing executive loosely based on food industry executive William Post. With the help of Melissa McCarthy as former NASA scientist Donna Stankowski, Cabana is tasked with beating Kellogg's rival Post Cereals to market with a shelf-stable pastry, a product that would change the breakfast world of 1963. The right thingbut about corporate snack innovation, and played with the absurdity that that premise implies.

A murderer's row of well-known funny people shows up to do 30-second bits at a time, from Hugh Grant as diva Tony the Tiger (playing in your reputation in the real world) to Drew Tarver from The other two playing Pop, one of Rice Krispies' pet elves (playing on the reputation of his character in The other two). It's a pretty family affair, even if most of the jokes will go over kids' heads. How familiar are your children with the January 6 insurrection?

Photo: John P. Johnson/Netflix

Naturally, the premise sounds silly. Silly, even. But Seinfeld doesn't let on. without freezing It's fast-paced, bravely acted and its script, co-written by Spike Feresten, Andy Robin and Barry Marder, contains not even a hint of self-consciousness. It's also fun sometimes, even if it's a tacky and depressing little project.

There is no aspect of the American experience that cannot be incorporated into a product. This is one of the fundamental principles of advertising: the best way to sell something is to associate it with what the audience appreciates. But lately, Hollywood, in a desperate bid to land a family-friendly intellectual property that guarantees an audience, has also gotten in on the action. Consider: Flamin' hot turning a bag of Cheetos into a hymn to the idealized experience of entrepreneurial immigrants, Barbie as a pop-feminist treatiseeither Air like a dirge for monoculture. It is shameful to channel culture through this lens, to continually search for new paths marrying the human experience with the shit you can buy.

Juxtaposing without freezing Compared to other films in the burgeoning canon of product mythology, it's not as obvious what Seinfeld is trying to accomplish with his film's antics. But there are dots to connect. Bob Cabana, in a running joke, continually finds inspiration in a pair of precocious children who go scavenging through Post Cereals dumpsters simply in a hurry, eating the leftover stuffing and other edible detritus the company throws away. Cabana and his peers at both Kellogg's and Post are corporate stooges who don't mind idealism. They just want to win the breakfast war, and are happy to put sugar and any other stable additives on supermarket shelves if it increases sales. Similarly, they're eager to grease their palms, striking deals with everyone from Nikita Khrushchev (Dean Norris) to an FDA agent (Fred Armisen) to bring their latest food experiment to American tables.

Photo: John P. Johnson/Netflix

Despite its familiar appearance, without freezing It is a decidedly cynical work. Step outside the candy-colored glow of its warm cinematography and the outlook is bleak. Just as Pop-Tarts come from movie executives studying trash, Hollywood's desperation for marketable intellectual property means studios are happy to greenlight literal trash. What does it mean that Jerry Seinfeld, a man who never needs to work another day in his life if he doesn't want to, a guy most famous these days for just hanging out – Are you back with a movie that proves that Hollywood will greenlight a movie about any old brand, no matter how absurd?

Turns out, not much. According to Seinfeld himself, without freezing It's simply an exercise in warm nonsense, Born from the grim early days of the COVID-19 pandemic. and to very long gestation joke about how much joy the gift brought him as a child. As revered as he is in comedy, his material It's never really been about pressing buttons.no matter what he may say about how PC culture makes comedy business difficult.

The thing is, Seinfeld's Pop-Tart joke is correct. pop tarts do make you feel good. They're spicy and sweet and just the right size to enjoy without feeling too bad about it. I still buy myself a box of Pop-Tarts from time to time, just as someone who quits smoking might indulge in wasting time. I can forget about myself for a minute when I eat a Pop-Tart. It's a nice feeling. without freezing It's not about that feeling. It's about the product. The film represents months and months of sustained work by hundreds of people, including many of the most talented and recognizable names in their field, in the service of a story that possesses no satirical touch or human connection. He takes all the pleasure he can get from a Pop-Tart and chokes on it.

without freezing now streaming on Netflix.